Part Five: First Morning

Andrew opened his eyes, and looked at his watch.
14:15.
Why has time become such an important thing for him? Nevertheless, it would soon cease to be so.
But then again, no. School was starting.
Again.
Andrew shook his head, got up, and was a little surprised to see that his feet were weaker than any other day he woke up.
He walked to the bathroom. He turned on the light (there was no way he could see anything without light, having just woken up), he took a piss, he washed his hands, and then he looked in the mirror.
Eyes red, and around them black circles even a panda bear would envy, his skin pale, the color of someone who has died a little while ago but probably paid little to no attention to it, and kept doing what he always did.
He stroked his hair a bit.
It was absolutely no use. The infinite mess that he called hair was there to stay, exactly as messy as it wanted.
Andrew shrugged, and turned around to leave. He didn't brush his teeth. He wouldn't be bothered to.
He greeted his mother with a slow and nearly silent "mhmm hmmhmm", and went back to his room.
He looked at the first thirty two pages of Chuck Palahniuk's Fight Club he had printed (and read) yesterday, and he let a little smile.
Even he didn't know why.
"Gooooood moring, Vietnam" he said as he closed the door.
Three faces looked at him, sorrow, pain, and anger depicted on them as obvious as wearing a sign about each one's feelings.
Fox was wearing black. Now that's something Andrew didn't see every day.
Solidus was wearing white. Andrew knew that where other people wore black to show their sorrow, Solidus wore white. Otherwise, he would seem to be in eternal mourning.
Chris... Well, Chris was wearing a formal costume, which showed a lot, given that Chris never even wore a shirt.
They all looked at him.
"And how is the lovely bunch today?" Andrew asked.
Fox raised an eyebrow.
"How do you suppose we are? We haven't been like this for a very long time. And you had to go and spoil it all. Ruin it all." Fox was really, really in a bad mood.
"It was crucial. As well as inevitable. It was not entirely the boy's fault." Solidus said.
"And I believe you are forgetting, dear Fox, that I didn't do it. We did this together. All of us." Andrew said, an expression of apathy drawn on his face.
"Solidus? How about you?"
"I have been worse, kid. But I have been better as well. Worry not about me. Worry more about yourself, and where you go from here."
Andrew nodded.
"Chris?"
Chris looked towards the windows, but because he was still wearing his goggles that hid his eyes from sight, he had to point at them.
Andrew looked at the windows. He was again in the room with no doors or exits save for the windows. The town was living its fast paced life as usual, and despite the fact that it was noon, the sky was that of a really dark evening turning into night.
He started paying attention to the clouds, and then realized what it was that Chris was showing him.
The clouds were moving in an abnormally fast pace, only to gather in the middle of the sky and form the face of someone wearing a crown of thorns on his head. The cloudy figure of the man turned a piece of it to red, which looked like sliding down his cheek from his eye, as if he cried a tear of blood.
Andrew looked at Chris. They both nodded.
He walked around a little, seemingly thinking about something. Then he stopped, and he clapped his hands once, in the manner of one who has thought things over and has come up with an interesting solution.
"My good friends. I feel your sorrow deep inside, as much as you feel mine. Yesterday, we walked into the edge of a cliff, and we dived. We had no regrets. No worries. No hard feelings. Not anymore.
And despite all of the laws of this world, despite the Anima Mundi, despite what passes for common knowledge, that once you fall, you die, we knew better. We took that otherwise final step, with no sorrow, and no happiness to it. Exactly like Odin when he plucked out his own eye and threw it in the Well Of Mimir, trading it for all the knowledge in the world, stating his place as Father of Gods (at least until someone else stole the title from him).
Despite all chances, we survived. We lie there, in the depths of our would-be grave, and we are powerless. Full of wounds. Broken bones. Our heads hurt like someone hit us with a sledgehammer repeatedly. Yet, inside, we start to see..
We begin to realize, that what doesn't kill us, makes us stronger. That, and the fall did not kill us. Imagine. When our wounds are healed. When the pain stops. When our heads ache no more. Then, we will be stronger. And we will continue our quest for knowledge, power, and control. Three things, that are barely distinguished from each other by a very fine line.
Like the first monkeys shot into space. We take the knife and we sacrifice our selves, only to return stronger. To help others be strong. To awaken and help others reach awakening, as well as learning from others, and awakening with their help.
As for.."
Now Andrew looked down, bitterly, not because he thought he was hurt (he didn't mind), but because he felt that he had hurt her. So did the others, and a few seconds afterwards, Andrew continued.
"As for our beloved Stephanie. It appears that in this leap of faith, we forced her to jump with us, only from the exact opposite side of the cliff. But she fell. And she broke bones, she gained bruises, and she aches, just like us. And maybe even more so.
But.
What has risen, may fall.
What has fallen, may, and will rise again.
Therefore, if we assume that this was something more than a traumatic experience for her, she will definitely gain knowledge from this leap of faith, as i said before.
Brothers. We have to be strong. We all know it is a terrible loss, but we also know, that it's only after you've lost everything that you are free to do anything. We must be patient, and await our recovery from this sad state of affairs, which we have brought to ourselves, as much as we did to Stephanie.
We have endured much. So have others. What distinguishes us from others, is the fact that we have come to understand our pain. To learn from it consciously. We have actually learned to learn. Be the teacher pain, loss, suffering, a simple mistake, or the joy of the world. We are survivors. And we -"
The door to Andrew's room opened, and in came his father, with his enormous belly, and the silly grin he always had on his face.
"How is my young little lad? Eh? What's up? How you doin'?" He said, his gigantic stomach bouncing up and down as he spoke.
Andrew looked at him in a manner that you look at someone when they either bother you for absolutely no reason, interrupting something they would never dream of understanding, you want them tortured immediately for this blasphemy, or all of the above.
His father's mouth closed, and he walked out of the room, slowly.
Fox, Chris and Solidus were shaking their heads.
"And we will continue to be so.." Andrew said, eyes closed and eyebrows lowered.
They all nodded in agreement.
Andrew went to the windows to look outside.
He thought that somewhere out there, even if that somewhere was nowhere near by human standards, there was she.
Self improvement, he thought, was self-destruction.
As above so below.
He turned around to see the others.
Solidus was wearing gray.
Chris had thrown away the all the parts of the formal costume he didn't need, he had cut the pants (probably using his hands) so that they looked like shorts, and he had undone all the buttons of his shirt.
Fox was staring at the floor. he let a small sigh, and suddenly the black coat he was wearing turned to it's usual leathery brown. He left the remaining attire black.
Andrew smiled, and turned around to face the windows again, lost in his thoughts.